Medication?

The one problem we keep running into is everyone wants to medicate Grace. My thoughts... I want Grace to learn to be able to control her temper because she has been given the tools to do so. Am I asking for the world? I am afraid of medications making her a zombie or masking the good parts of Grace. The other problem with medications are there are so many different ones. The doctors want to "try" medications. I have to say that I am more comfortable with her in the residential facility and them working on finding a medication and a dose that works. I am glad that we still have the final say in what she is given. When Grace was in the hospital I didn't like the idea of giving her a medication and then sending her home to see if it works. I was afraid of her completely blowing up and us trying to figure out what to do. I think a past experience may be playing into my fears a little. Last year Grace had been given lortab for pain after a surgery. Within two hours Grace had a major reaction to the lortab. She had a full psychosis episode. Talk about scary. She was screaming that she wanted to die. She said let me die in peace, I don't want to die in pain. That was such a scary night. Taking Grace to the hospital that night was so stressful. Dad held Grace while I drove. I was in tears and flying down the road trying to get to the hospital as soon as possible. I feel like this is what is making me so nervous about the doctors giving her different medications. I keep telling my self to just have faith in the process.